Starting a New.

Change is something that is complicated but so rewarding. I think I have learned a few to many life lessons in the last 7 months and change and patience tend to be in the middle of it. Change is hard. Trust me I know. But what I think is interesting is that most people do not know where to start. Oddly enough its something that is not that hard. Observing it. Thats all it takes. The hard part I think people have is seeing what the problem is. But as I have been changing for the better, I have noticed that by following these three simple steps has made the process go a lot smoother.

The three steps:
1. Observing the Problem.
2. Decided if you are going to take action or not.
3. Take action on your choice and follow through.

Sounds simple. But I know its not. Habits are hard to break. Oddly enough it takes 21 days to break a habit and to create a new one. Not that long if you think about it, there are 365 days in a year and to change something in 21 days is short. I know some habits take longer than 21 days and I know some can be shorter but as we go onto a new year. Think about what you personally can do to change for the better.

One thing I am currently working on is not being so harsh on myself. I expect a lot out of myself and when I don't have patience on myself then I often run into a problem. Being so harsh on myself that it gets in the way. I am grateful I had three great people in my life tell me all at the same to give myself a break. Being aware of this has helped me a lot and I have noticed that I am improving. This change has been hard but its been for my benefit. I know there are things in my life that I cannot change or improve upon in one night and sometimes that drives me nuts. But I figured out that not enjoying the personal growth and the journey wouldn't be fun if we had everything change overnight. I realized that I was not doing that. So my goal is to have more fun and take things one day at a time and not worry about others.

I hope everyone is having a good holiday and hope as you get ready for the new year that you can figure out what you personally can improve on.

Individual Nirvana: Discovering

So its been sometime since I last wrote on here so lets catch you up with my last six months! My life has been a roller coaster that wouldn't stop until the HUGE MASSIVE CRASH! So six months ago I started a self discovery journey. I started accepting a lot about myself and events in my life that I could not prevent. This came with the help a book my therapist gave me The Mindfulness and Acceptance Workbook for Anxiety. It gave me a lot incites in ways I never thought of, but because of this I started something called Radical Acceptance. I happened to be accepting so much in my life so fast that it turned my life upside down! And I probably should mention this happened in a 15 week period and I was taking 5 gen eds, 5 dances classes and still doing weekly voice lessons. So really nothing new with my busy life. But with that element it kinda changes things just a tad. Usually acceptance on many life matters takes a lot longer than 15 weeks (At least the big ones at least). But because of this, I had many puzzle pieces on the ground that I needed to pick up to keep moving forward. I cannot describe how many pieces were on the ground. It emotionally got to me and I started another phase called Emotional Indigestion. This started right around when I went on my trip to New York. Kinda of a sucky time for that start in my opinion, but life happens. I was grateful that the city I dearly love became a distraction for a week. Then after the trip, I really just was trying to survive day to day just to function and keep moving forward. I started school and then got cast in a dream show I have always wanted to be part of! HAIR! Then rehearsals and school were in full swing with the emotional indigestion at its most intense stage and then about half way through the semester I finally hit the brick wall I was waiting for and I was a mess! The brick wall started with a nice car crash. My car was almost totaled but I was ok is more importantly and I was not hurt. I then became not emotionally stable (it was so bad at some points to where you could just give me a look and I would loose it), my panic attacks were out of control (which I had not had this many in years.), plus I wasn't functioning anymore and just was ready to throw in the towel. Thankfully I had people at my side when this happened because I am pretty sure I would be out of school by now if it weren't the case. I am grateful for my therapist Dr. Sherline Dean, Lisa, Craig, Chelsea, Jaydynn, Elder Horton, and my voice teacher Brian for helping me guide me. Its been a journey I will never forget.
Its been 30 weeks and I have picked up the pieces to keep moving forward. I am functioning and my panic attacks are more just worrying now (which I just worry all the time because Im so hard on myself! I decided I cannot do that to myself anymore because its only going to hurt me.), And Emotionally.... Well Im still not fully back to normal Dylan emotion scale but I can only do so much. I got to take it one day at a time. And for what I have been through these past 30 weeks is more of a miracle! I was not the same person 30 weeks ago. I have been inspired, uplifted, and rejuvenated into a individual.

I Will Not Be Someone Else! I am Dylan and Dylan is an individual.  I am finding the Balance to MY life. Though this is a life process I know I am an individual and though times can be rough I will always have people at my side that love me.

Thank you for all who read my blog. I appreciate it. Life is a discovery and we will always have it if you keep an open mind and heart to the world. Discovery happens everywhere. Its not as far away as you think. Its right next to you surprisingly. Look for the Positives and live life to the fullest.

Peace and Love :)

Patina Miller and cast Raise their Voices to Heaven!

Ladies and Gentlemen Raise your Voices to Broadways next rising star Patina Miller! This show is her Broadway debut and she is on fire! Her fierce performance as Deloris Van Cartier makes this show a smash hit. Her stage presence is a very unique. I just wanted to her to keep going and going because its a real treat to sit in a theatre and see her do her thing. The one thing in particular I love about Patina is her voice. So much spin and diction going on when she sings. Its in a nice place where she can riff and do what she wants with the music. 

During the performance what really interested me was that they did not put all the songs that were on the Sister Act cd in the show. Honestly I thought that it was a smart move. The songs How I got the Calling and Do the Sacred Mass are unessirary in my opinion. Take me to heaven, I could be that Guy, Raise your Voice, The Life I never Led, Fabulous Baby (Reprise), and Sister Act were all great story telling numbers in the show. My favorite numbers were The Life I never Led and Sister Act. They were very touching and moving numbers. The communication and the choices made by Patina Miller and Marla Mindelle (Mary Robert) were strong choices that made their performances rememberable, engaging, fabulous, and moving. I look for strong communication in theatre and I saw many strong choices being made by the cast the entire night. 

Some of my problems with the show were the light designs. I feel that the lighting designs were great, but I feel the choice of color, and the connection to the music and the story line could of had a stronger impact to the piece. Light and color are so important. It impacts how we feel in an environment. I wish that when the Nuns were doing their numbers at Mass that the design team would of used more color and lighting that they used on the stain glass. 

Overall, Sister Act is a hillarious, joyous show that I would go pay to see again. Patina Miller really makes this show and I feel that if she was not in this show that Sister Act would not be the Sister Act that we all know. The Nuns were awesome and I want to start a Sister Act in Utah! Raise your Voices! 

* If you want more information about the show, You can email me or call me. 

The Book of Mormon Is Something Incredible!

There is a reason why The Book of Mormon won 9 Tony Awards this year! Josh Gad and Andrew Rannells make this production an absolute success! Their connection, focus, singing, dancing, and acting were genius. It is not everyday you see a perfect pair on stage together. My best description of the performance is a ping pong war! I love when I see actors are playing off each other because its when actors are at there best! 

Most people in Utah and the Utah theatre community believe this musical is about making fun of the LDS Church. Lets first clear this up. The musical is not making fun of the church! It was very informative and very funny, and full of jokes only people from Utah would get! There were times during the performance I was the only person in the entire theatre laughing my head off! 

This Musical has helped the LDS Church in many ways and I will back this musical to my grave! Because of this musical LDS church was able to start I am A Mormon Campaign. This campaign has clarified who Mormons are and was allowed people to understand that Mormons are just like anyone else. 

In act one, you get very accurate details of how the LDS church runs the mission field. I would say if you are a conservative person, then this is not a show for you. I am sure you would leave by the fourth number just because of the vulgarity. I feel I should clarify that the song Hasa Diga Eebowai is not for shock value just because South Park can shock people! This scene is when the Elder Price and Elder Cunningham arrive to Uganda and are experiencing culture shock. Anyone would experience culture shock if you went into another culture that is the exact opposite of happy bubble Salt Lake City, Utah. 

Act two is full of Mormon myths. I personally had an absolute hoot seeing this! It is clever way to poke fun of what people see Mormons as. The Myths are all set up by Elder Cunningham. Elder Cunningham has never read the Book of Mormon and is asked by Nabulungi (Nikki M. James, 2011Tony Award winner for Best Featured Actress) to teach her tribe the Book of Mormon. The song Making things up again sets the rest of the act up. The Tribe learns Elder Cunningham’s version of the Book of Mormon and Baptizes the tribe into the church. He also gets Elder Price to learn to be humble and gain his faith back. That moment was by far one of the most touching moments I have ever seen on the stage. It really sets the tone of what religion and faith is. When the Mission President comes to see what the Ugandan Mission has done, everything that everyone thought Elder Cunningham did comes a reality in telling of the story of Joseph Smith the American Moses. I honestly think that number is by far one the most funniest things I have ever seen. Everything that Elder Cunningham taught falls apart and you have a happy tribe thinking that their AIDS is going to be cured and a Mission President that is freaking out. It was a very colorful comedy that I wish I had money to see again. 

Overall, this musical is a very creative. The music and acting were fabulous! The Choreography could be taken to new levels, but works very well as it is set now. I also think what the media has displayed about this musical has gotten people way to worked up. This musical is not the must vulgar musical ever produced. If you can handle any PTC or SLAC shows, you should be able to handle this show. I am a Book of Mormon fan for life! This is God’s Favorite Musical! 

*If you want a more detailed description of the show. You can email me or call me and I would be gladly to answer your questions. 

The Beauty is....

Before I even start I am going to warn you that I am going into deep thought. And no, I am not going to talk about Light in the Piazza. Not a musical theatre post today I am entering the waters of art. So I'm currently taking an art class at the U of U called Language of Color. Its quite interesting how color is used and how one may perceive colors and the application. The class talks about how color is applied in art and how we perceive, interpret, and analysis a piece of art according to culture, media etc... Within this class we read a book by David Batchelor called Chromophobia. This book is by far one of the most interesting books of I have ever read. It really has forced me to ponder a lot about color and its impact to our world. Its alive and organic.

In the first few pages of the book he talks about this house out in Great Britain. The outside was a red brick victorian look to it but when you went into the house he describes it like entering another universe. The inside was completely white. The white was describe as so pure that no other colors besides grey and black would even look good within the house. What also fascinates me about this house as well is that he describes overall the idea of the house as an inside of an egg. How cool! I highly recommend people reading this book but I am warning you that you need to have an open mind.

This next part I feel is quite important. Thinking of how something as simple as a rainbow can have more inner meaning than we can imagine has always fascinated me. Look beyond what we already know.

Mark Twain states “We have not the reverent feeling for the rainbow that a savage has, because we know how it is made. We have lost as much as we gained by prying into that matter.” His statement I feel is in this sense "prying into that matter" refers to youth verses adults. Youth describe color in marvelous ways. When I talk to kids about color they make it sound like color is alive and moving in an organic and linear matter. We loose that as we grow older sadly. The rainbow is a seven colors of wonder. Youth strikingly find the inner meaning to color. They find life in it. Some kids even live color. As an artist I wish I could have more of that in me. 

The rainbow is a source of many meanings. Though ones interpretation may be different we all come to verbal understanding of what we think through communication, science and art. Verbally, Mark Twain statement. "We have lost as much as we gained by prying into that matter." shows a very important matter to how we communicate what color and the rainbow is. Prying into organic, natural, pure, inconsistent matter sometimes looses the depth of energy. Color is independent. A universal phenomenon. I feel that cannot fully be explained in words because its has life of an unknown semiotic form. There are somethings in this world that cannot always be explained and answered. The rainbow being one of them. We know the basics of Newtons discoveries with the prism and how systems have been made for colors but what if we could look into it even deeper. Understand the feeling, energy, life of color. Even imagining living color. How cool would that be?! If I could understand the rainbow that way I feel I would be living color.

We all will have a different idea to what the rainbow means to us but look at the Beauty of the rainbow. A natural phenomenon that engages the world in so many ways. Appreciate color and live your life with color. 

Recreating the 65th Annual Tony Awards part 2

I apologize for the slow return of part 2. Elder Horton thought my recreation of the Tony Awards was pretty awesome. That made my day! But before I get back to talking about part three and four, I must apologize that are no photos of this creation.... Kinda came down to the last minute wire so I didnt have time to get pictures.... 


Part 3: Me creating the awards show was actually quite easy surprisingly. Time was my issue. When the actual Awards show was going on. I was on a computer putting the results on a document. Then working with envelopes for the results and then the Best Musical giant envelope. The envelope for Best Musical was pretty epic. It had a big marque of Best Musical Goes To? (In Gold) It also contained many music notes, stars, etc... The one thing I am still sad about is not having a musical number pop out of the box. If only I were a wizard and could actually make that into a reality. O well. 


Part 4: The Box. This part was interesting. I thought maybe this would fit in a small box but.... My creativity required a bigger box. I put all the stuff in the bigger box and Mr. Rubber Ducky was safely put in surprisingly. I would of cried if he would of died in the process. But he is safe. Then I ran into another problem. Shipping.... I wanted Elder Horton to have the package on the day he received his mail but I knew that wasn't possible so what do I do? I willingly payed $30 dollars to get it expressed mail so he could get it. I am such a nice friend aren't I? The Tony's are important! And overall I feel it was worth it because I made Elder Horton happy and gave him something interesting to do at the MTC. 


Overall: A Complete Success. 


Now to the part that I kinda have been pondering over the last few weeks. Creative Summer Adventures you and your friends can enjoy.
I think it is kinda sad to hear people say I would rather be in school than be having a summer. Really?! As much as I love school, I still need a break. I am in summer school now and I really miss my summer. There are a lot of things I wanted to do but are now on back hold because of school. So I have decided to give some interesting/creative Ideas for you to do maybe over the summer. 

1) Reading a book. Your thinking this may not. But it really is. If you really invest into a book, I can say you will be part of the adventure. Perfect way to get the imagination rolling. 

2) Spin Art. If you dont know what this is then you are in for a treat. Wikipedia does a better explanation of this so here is what they say. "To create spin art, an artist initially decorates or drips paint onto a canvas. The canvas can be anything; however, the most common form of canvas is a small rectangular piece of cardboard. Before the paint on the canvas dries, the artist secures the canvas to a platform that can be rotated at high speed. Once the canvas is secure, the artist can then begin spinning the canvas. Most spinning platforms are electrical or battery operated, with more elaborate platforms enabling the artist to vary the rotational speed. 

3)  Creating a floral arrangement or planting a flower pot. These are both very fun projects and long lasting (if you take care of them.) If you do a floral arrangement I will tell you that if you want your arrangement to survive for a while two really good things to do are 1. change the water out everyday or every other day. 2. If you add sprite instead of water your arrangement is getting some really good nutrients. Sugars. Sugars help the arrangement last a little bit longer. 

4) Have a group of friends create some tie dye shirts.  

5) Go to a Museum or Arts Festival. 

6) Volunteer your time at the hospital or any local community center. Giving back your gifts to others are some of the biggest rewards in life.

 7) Road Trip!!! Get a group a friends and plan to one day road trip somewhere and go have some fun! 

8) Create your own game and have your friends try it out. (This is a great way for babysitters to have a second to sit down.)  

Thou things may be expensive and we are facing some economic troubles in our country, there are many ways to entertain yourself during your summer vacation! "No Day But Today"!

 

Recreating the 65th Annual Tony Awards!

One may ask by this Title.... How can you recreate the Tony Awards before they even happen? I will tell you how! Missionary Training Center (MTC) Style. I have a friend that is on his mission and he will be missing the Tony's this year. So I thought to myself "What if I send the Tony's to him?" (Light Bulb Moment of Creativity)!!!!
So I decided to make something that is really exciting to some people funny.
Here is part one of my re creation of the Tony's: A letter of Formal Invitation.


Dear Elder Horton,

You have been formally invited to attend the 65th Annual Tony Awards by the First Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and their sidekick Mr. Rubber Ducky. President Thomas S. Monson and Mr. Rubber Ducky will be hosting the show. Since you are on your mission and we know you will not be able to attend the Tony’s on June, 12 2011, the First Presidency has decided to bring the show to you! Please expect a box sometime after June 12, 2011, with the results inside. Along with Mr. Rubber Ducky. Mr. Rubber Ducky has never been to France. He asked the First Presidency if he could join your journey. They told him that it was a wonderful idea. Take care of Mr. Rubber Ducky. He is kinda hard to handle at times like most Rubber Ducks are. The First Presidency expects Mr. Rubber Ducky to have a safe trip to and from Paris, France.

Here enclosed is the ballot. Please vote accordingly. When the results come you will have gold stars enclosed in the box. For each one you get right you will be able to put a gold star on your ballot. There will be six gold stars marked on your ballot automatically. The First Presidency experts Donny Osmond, Gladys Knight, Dylan Adams and of course the guest star Jimmer Ferdette believe you need these six stars if you are going up against Broadway Expert Dylan Adams! Jimmer suggests you don’t get JIMMERED. You will be competing for an amazing prize! If you have more stars than Dylan then you will an awesome Missionary Prize!  Good Luck Missionary. And remember don’t get JIMMERED.

Sincerely yours,

The First Presidency, and Mr. Rubber Ducky

P.S. If you get in trouble for this little game. Then You have all rights to blame me!

This is Mr. Rubber Ducky. He is the First Presidency Side Kick! And hopefully going to Paris France.

Part 2 of the Tony's Re-Creation: Creating the Ballot.
Since I didn't want him to get crushed I gave Elder Horton six stars! Well and partially because the name of the play: Mother F**cker with the Hat. I don't think the MTC or he would appreciate having to vote on that so I gave the point to him for all the nominations that play got so he wouldn't have to deal with that. So Instead of just printing off a ballot and just sending it to him, I actually printed off a ballot and cut out all the nominations and the categories he automatically won and made another ballot. I didn't think it was going to be that hard. But as much as a perfectionist I am, it can take sometime to have everything to my approval before sending or presenting something. But more importantly I am still loosing!!!! There is a lot on the line here! Currently I am at 0 stars! And the Elder is at 6 stars! I am very far behind! I really hope I don't get Jimmered!

Part 3: The Awards Show
Well since I cant send a Musical number to him...... (If I could I so would!) I decided to actually to make it simple and kinda to the point. An introduction with the Hosts President Monson and his Sidekick Mr. Rubber Ducky. Then I decided to go straight to the Awards and announce who won the Tony's! As most people know when I do creative things like this, I usually have to go out with a Big Bang. In this case Announcing Best Musical! By Far the Most important in my book! So I am going to get a big envelope and Print of a picture of the best musical poster. (This might not be as big and as exiting but I will make the Envelope exciting before the Elder opens it. Since I don't have this phase done I can't really post much more about this part.

Part 4: Sending the Tony's to the MTC
Well Since part three isn't done I cant go to much into detail but say there will be pictures of this process. But I am debating if I want to get a big box to make him think I did this big elaborate thing. But that is still in the debating stage. And I have to find a way for Mr. Rubber Ducky to have a safe trip.

There will be a part 2 Recreating the 65th Annual Tony Awards with the rest of the details. Also there will be a section on how you can be creative this summer!

Pure Imagination

When Glee sang Pure Imagination, I really was taken back to my to so many childhood memories. I also thought of how amazing the Movie is. So here is Gene Wilder singing Pure Imagination:

Willy Wonka:
[Spoken]
Hold your breath
Make a wish
Count to three

[Sung]
Come with me
And you'll be
In a world of
Pure imagination
Take a look
And you'll see
Into your imagination

We'll begin
With a spin
Traveling in
The world of my creation
What we'll see
Will defy
Explanation

If you want to view paradise
Simply look around and view it
Anything you want to, do it
Wanta change the world?
There's nothing
To it

There is no
Life I know
To compare with
Pure imagination
Living there
You'll be free
If you truly wish to be

If you want to view paradise
Simply look around and view it
Anything you want to, do it
Wanta change the world?
There's nothing
To it

There is no
Life I know
To compare with
Pure imagination
Living there
You'll be free
If you truly
Wish to be



What I feel Willy Wonka truly points out is a pure imagination is the best imagination you could possibly have. Imagination leads to all possibilities. Imagination brings us the new and the future. Imagination should be encourage at all ages. Children I think are the purest of all imaginations. There imagination is so big that nothing stops them. But the question is, why do we loose that imagination as we grow up? With many theories in mind, I think the main two reasons we loose our imagination is because we are afraid what others will think and us saying no. No closes our minds and closes opportunities. Whats the fun in that. Have you ever spent an entire day just saying "Yes and"? I think I have had the most interesting days when I actually say "Yes and". You should try it. You might think that idea is absolutely scary... but its really not. "Yes and" really in my opinion is my best friend. It makes life interesting. Make your life have a pure imagination and say "Yes And"! 

Passionate Life

Since my Freshman year is over, I decided to stay in school for the summer... (I am guessing your thinking at this point: "Why would someone torture themselves from the summer".) If you think about it,  Utah is cold as the Tundra in Russia right now... And to tell you the truth I really do not know how I even convinced myself into doing a 15 credit hour semester! But I will almost be done with my general edu. requirements.
Reason 1 for staying for the summer semester) If I get a job opportunity in the future I wont have to worry about my Gen. Ed's. They are such a pain! LIKE WORLD OF DINOSAURS!!! That class was T-O-R-T-U-R-E! If you take that class at the U of U, Take it From Hagrid not Irmis!
Reason 2) Gets me that much closer to never having to take a math class ever again
Reason 3) I wont have to take classes that I don't have the attention span for.
Reason 4) They are out of the way and I can move on to Bigger and Better things like Broadway!

Education is important. It is a privilege to have it. I a grateful for the education I have because I know many people in my life that wish they could of had the opportunity to receive it. If you ever get the chance to get an education you should take it seriously! What annoys me is how many people in the US don't take their education seriously. There are millions of people that would die for the education we have. We have just about unlimited resources to us with having an education.  If you didn't know this random fact: McDonald's wont even hire anyone without a Diploma or GED (Unless you are working towards it.). Its a privilege to have it! We live in a country where we have so many opportunities! Our education opens doors to the world and allows others to have the chance to fulfill their dreams. Take your education seriously!
I am currently taking a linguistics class and I really like it. It forces me to step out of my comfort zone in some sense because I have to talk to other people that I don't know that are not from the USA. Its kinda cool because I get to experience hands on what language barriers can bring towards a basic conversation.  I also like this class because its perfect way to understand effective communication. And I also get to read plays in the class so it makes it even better. But what really I think my point to this is today in class we were talking about how there are no wrong or right answers in defining culture. Can you define culture? Its a very broad definition I must say. But what really interested me was that there were a few international students in the class that stated that they had never been in class where the teacher said it was ok to give an answer without it being right or wrong. I thought it was cool because of the cultural differences. I believe their are about 15 different cultural backgrounds in that class. That is a lot and to think that is just small. Culture is everywhere! Take pride in your Culture! Its our superstructure!  

Well within my freshman year, I have learned a few things about myself. I could make this extremely long list of things but here are some highlights:

- Take It Personal! (Rance Wright)
- I am an extreme over achiever! (Yes this is bad at times.... I expect a lot out of myself.)
- I judge myself to Harshly!!! ( I am still working on it! Its a life process.)
- I AM GOOD ENOUGH!
- I really gotta work on my dancing....
- I just cant leave my past behind...( Ya we all make mistakes... But that one was a biggie! Once I accepted what had happened to me in my past I really took off I feel in my career. I wasn't afraid anymore.)
- I am not a bad person for not going on a Mission. There is another mission awaiting me in the future.
-I feel like a kid when I am working.  I can play and explore the out of the ordinary.
- I grew up
- I wish I could have more of a social life.
- I have people in my life that love me.
- I think I would be an absolute mess without have my MTP Family! They are absolutely amazing! They inspire me to strive for my goals. I think this is first theatre company I have been with that has actually gotten to know each other so well. This family really is important to me. I love everyone in MTP!!!!!!
- My life is Unique! My journey is Unique! I am Unique!  
- I miss clogging sometimes ( A lot more than usual.) Yes NRG Family I admit it! I miss you guys! You guys are awesome! If I had the time to compete I would come back. But I maybe in the future.
-Music Theory is like math. Maybe one day I will have that Light Bulb moment and it will all make sense.
- I Love My Family! They are the best support system!  

I am passionate about my life! You should be too! Everyone should! Whatever your passion is in life.
Be passionate!

Judgement

So over the last few weeks I have been experiencing some life changing moments in my life. I finally realized what really holds me back from giving me my most honest work and what truly is hurting me on a personal level. Judgement. We all do it everyday. Judgement is normal. I am sure that we do not even realize it at times we are judging others and ourselves. Throughout my life its been hard to get anyone to except me for who I am. I am different and I dont see what is so bad about that. There is nothing wrong with it. It hurts me when people judge me because I am different. But more importantly is that I myself to not judge myself so harshly. All my life I have been wanting to prove that I am good enough and that I worth someones time. I work so hard and I feel after I get critiqued by someone that I internalize it and then just slap myself in the face because I am not "good enough"! I am good enough! I do not know why I do this to myself but its hard to see that I am so harsh on myself. At times I get told I am over achiever. Which is true at times but thats how I was raised. I want to go on that stage and give the audience the 200% performance not the 100% performance. I feel that its been motivation for me at times but I feel that since its a given for me that its time to have a change of realization. One I am not going to get it right. Its ok, thats whats life about. I am going to be ok. Judgement is natural but it can hurt you. Being part of the entertainment business requires a lot of strength because of judgement and opinion and so many other aspects that come into play. I one goal that I decided that is going to benefit me was not judging myself so hard. I am good enough, I have been told that many times. I have to be honest with myself and allow myself to go and work on goals and not push so hard on judging myself to were it starts to hurt personally. Then I wonder why I ever really started judging myself so hard? When did it even start? Who knows? But what I do know is that its been going on for to long. I did take the time to actually figure this out for my benefit and I really have been doing this all my life because of what others around me have done to me. Its so weird. My life has been a roller coaster ride that just mystifies in the air and I let something so simple get in my way..... Ya one thing I want in my life is a no judgement policy. This policy to me would not to judge based off looks, personality, opinions etc... Its a great way to be open to the world. I think this world would be a better place if we did not judge so harshly. Now there are times when we have to judge like for jobs and and competitions. You do have to have opinions in these situations and that is fine but on a personal level I feel that is where we as people should allow others to be who they are. To live life with someone excepting them. Really that is one of the few things life I would just love to have. Sadly I do not think that is ever truly going to happen anytime soon, for me at least. I have a close family that cares for me and loves me and for who I am. The musical theatre program has been such an influence on my life that I have literally have grown up because of their love. The Passion I get in that environment is just so fresh and joyous. It truly drives me. I am grateful for that in my life.

So recently I really have been quite annoyed with people judging me because of my career choice. Yes its different. I love the stage. You would never want me to be your child's math teacher or english teacher or your accountant. Its not my thing and also I am not that great at those things. Yes I can do the basics but if you ever wanted me to do more then well.... That would just be story for the storybooks. We all have our talents and skills in life. I am good actor that wants a career on the stage and to give an audience that moment of hope and joy. The thought, the energy. The place where you can run away for a few minutes from reality. The theatre really is an outlet for me to run into another world for a few minutes. To be honest and living myself is all I want and the theatre does that for me. So please do not judge me for what I do for a career. To tell you the truth, I wish I was good at math because then I might be able to understand Music theory better and be able to do different things like chemistry. There are things in life that I will never be good at and thats ok. Why should I judge myself so hard? There is no reason for it. I am good enough and so is everyone in this world. We just have to find what makes us happy. The video that is posted above really touched me because its so true. I hope I get it right. And then this other video below I think is so fun. I feel it shows that people are strong and we can put up with crap but we never truly have to deal with it when people take a step to far.

Live life to the fullest and try not to judge yourself and others so harshly.

Stop and Relax!

This week has been a very interesting week. I have had three friends faint in public this week. One friend that told me she was pregnant. One very close friend that currently lives in Hawaii and experienced an insane Tsunami! And me of course catching myself stressing over stupid things before going into another panic attack. There are so many things we all have to worry about within a day that it makes us feel our lives are absolutely insane! Have you ever just told yourself to stop and relax?

Yesterday I told myself to stop and relax because I literally just stressing over nothing. Everyone I think needs to stop and relax every once in a while. If not then I would just figure you are going to burst or go nuts eventually. But what I consider healthy on keeping your mental stability in line is to at least take 30 minutes to 1 hour of your day to stop and relax. I feel it is very healthy to do this because it allows the body recoup itself and also allow you as human being to do what you need to do for your body. If it means go play a game of basketball, sleep, watch a movie, watch a TV show, make a snack, will only help yourself from not running out of energy. You might say I dont have that kind of time. Well if you work at a desk all day, you can always stop and have a small snack, stretch at your desk, make a phone call to a family member and catch up. There are many things to do with a few minutes of relaxing. Take the time to actually relax and enjoy life.

Here are some things that would help anyone within their everyday life:
1. Drink up to 8 glasses of water a day
2. Make sure you are getting enough sleep.
3. Try to make time to relax. Stressing will cause muscle tension and tighten the voice.
4. Make sure you get some type of physical exercise in daily.
5. Keep nutrition in mind. Never skip a meal. Your body needs consistent nourishment for you to go with your daily schedule. The more busy you the more important this is! Avoid high fatty foods. (This is a hard one for everyone) Fats take alot of your energy to digest.

There are many more things I could put on this list but those are just basics. We all have to be careful what we do to our bodies to make sure we are physically, mentally, and emotionally healthy because if we are not then we will not be able to keep going. We all need to take time in our day to stop and relax. If you are not doing this now. Try it you might like it.

Though life is like a Hawaiian Roller Coaster Ride, WE have the power to stop and relax. Be creative with that time when you relax. You could work on an art project. I have a latch hook I work on every once in a while I take these breaks. If your passionate about a sport or an art, during your break go enjoy that passion! If you need to just take a nap, take a nap. There are so many things we can do with our time. Take advantage to stop and relax.

Individuality

There is a quote that I have loved and have used for inspiration throughout my life. "It's easy to stand with the crowd. It takes courage to stand alone." I wish I knew who wrote this quote.... This quote I feel is a true statement to individuality. When I came across this quote when I was 14, I thought it was cool and had it put on my wall in my room. About a year later it came upon me that it did not matter what others thought of me as long as I was being true to myself and had a support system of my family. There is nothing wrong about being yourself. As long as you are honest and true to yourself, no one can deny it. That in itself will only allow others to respect you and your values. 

During my youth I was never excepted for who I was. Though it was hard for me to see my peers and my neighbors not except me for who I truly was, I really think it only made me stronger. I lived in a very conservative city during my childhood. Being different was considered a bad thing.... Weird I know, because no one is the same. We are all different! Why is being different considered a bad thing? If you look at entertainments most successful people ever, you will always consider the successful people Different and Unique! For example: Lady Gaga! She is true to herself! She lets her differences be her strengths! She is extremely creative. She has some of the most interesting ideas I think I seen! She is Passionate about what she does! She experiences Life! She stands out because she she took the courage to stand alone! 

Being an individual is not a bad thing! We are all different in our own way! I am glad that I am different because throughout my life I have experienced life in ways that I have never thought I would because I was being myself. As an actor being yourself and knowing who you are is so important! My individuality is unique and no one can take that away from me. No one can take that away from you! 

 
The reason I write this is because me and mom (Lisa) and I were talking about this tonight. I was talking about the musical Hair when this came up. The song "Where do I go" is a perfect example of this! Just so you know what is going on during this part of the musical, if you do not know what this musical is have never seen the show, This is were the tribe and has burnt their draft cards into the fire. Since this is illegal they are on there own. Since bringing up the song "Where do I go". As the song is in progression you see and experience that symbolic energy of individuality. Its such a powerful moment in the show and makes this musical so unique! They have found inner and true individuality! They created a revolution of individuality! If you know the song "Aquarius" (from the same musical) if you notice in the lyrics you see that individuality and revolution are all within the subtext of the song. "This is the dawning of the age of Aquarius" What do these lyrics mean to you? This is one of my favorite musicals and I recommend everyone to see it. But I must say this so we are all on the same page. I am not responsible for you getting offended by what I like and think is a great piece of art. If you do not do your research before seeing a production it is your own fault. I will not apologies for you getting offended if you do not do your research. When doing your research you are protecting yourself from getting into a situation that you do not want to be in.

Now back on a lighter note. Individuality is unique and beautiful! Don't be someone else! Be yourself! Be an individual because being yourself is cool!